So, as anyone who’s been following my self-pity wallowing facebook updates this last week will know (in detail) that I ended up in hospital for an unplanned appendicitis last Sunday.
It started with a stomach ache on Sunday morning, which I put down to a late night extra chilli chicken mixed kebab, but it continued to get worse, so I decided to do the thing that every doctor must hate, and self diagnosed an appendicitis using the internet.
To be fair, when I answered 4 questions and the answer the NHS site came back with was GO TO THE HOSPITAL NOW (in red) I decided to called a taxi. Lucky for me, the taxi driver had gone through the same thing and understood the urgency, unluckily for me he was also the slowest taxi driver in Bournemouth, and insisted on telling me how painful it was going to be.
Now here’s the thing about the NHS, people complain about it, but I’ve said it before, when it’s an emergency they are the best, it’s a simple as that. At reception I said “I think it’s my appendix” and they instantly rushed passed the 3 hour waiting list of drunks and skinheads covered in blood
It didn’t stop there, a nurse who knew about appendixes came to see me straight away, tapped me a couple of times on the stomach then tilted the bed backwards because I was going to pass out from the pain, she joked with me, called me a wimp, saying that only girls faint from pain but she did it to keep me talking
They booked the surgery for the same day and a surgeon came in on his day off to do it, they finished at 11pm and I woke up at 1am in a recovery room on my own with two nurses who were only there to monitor and look after me, they had finished for the night but had been asked to stay on – at this point I think I told one with big brown eyes that I loved her
On the ward the nurses were amazing, I slept a lot but they had to wake me up regularly to change drips, take blood, give me pills or stop me snoring, they didn’t do it with a shout of a shove, they did it with a gentle stroke on the arm, even when it was 3 or 4 am they were still kind and caring.
There were some downsides, firstly I won’t lie, the food in hospital is still the worst thing I’ve ever seen, we had a Russian guy serving food on our ward and I swear he must have been ex army, used to cooking up whatever he found in the field, I didn’t eat anything for almost a week
Then there were the other patients, some of whom where great, but some who were total and utter pricks. The guy in the bed next to me complained about everything, including the jelly which he said “tasted like it came from a packet”, I hated him so much I actually lay awake one night contemplating strangling him with my IV drip to give the nurses a break
But here’s the worse bit, the thing that made me so angry I tried to get out of bed and walk to the hospital shop, despite the fact I couldn’t yet make it to the bathroom
One morning, the nurses were all upset and talking, I asked Kerry who was on my ward what was wrong and she told me that management had issued an email stating that Nurses were to cut back to one ration of milk a day for themselves to save money, and they have to reply to confirm their agreement
When I went to sleep they were there, when I woke up they were there, they were patient and kind to everyone on the ward – even the prick, and in return they get war time rations on their personal milk allowance?
It wouldn’t take much to fix the NHS, the people on the ground level aren’t the problem, they go above and beyond every day, usually for no more money, the problem is the disconnection between them, and the accountants who think that 5p per milk severing per nurse per day will save the whole system
If it comes to it I’ll place an order for milk to be delivered to them every day, and if they need anything else, I’d do that as well, its people like nurses who remind us how much better we could all treat each other
- bod
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